


The First Lady

by bookworm03



Series: The First Lady [4]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Alternate Universe - Law Enforcement, Alternate Universe - Politics, Extramarital Affairs, F/M, First Lady AU, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-11-18 02:56:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11282328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm03/pseuds/bookworm03
Summary: Leslie wants to be happy, she's just trying to figure out what that means.





	The First Lady

**Author's Note:**

> With the exception of drabbles this will be the final instalment in this series. I hope you guys have enjoyed it as writing it has been a challenge in a lot of ways! I really do love this version of Leslie and Ben so definitely continue to prompt me if there's more you'd like to see from this verse. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and commenting, you guys are the best. And thank you to my dear c00kie for always giving good advice and not letting me spiral.

“You were amazing.”

His hair is greyer than it had been four years ago and his frown lines are more prominent, but still he grins and leans into her.

“You were more amazing.” Ed says with a warm kiss. It’s not urgent, but his hands run over her back. “Thank you for being there.”

He says it like he knows there was somewhere else she could’ve been. It’s almost like a part of him is thanking her for not leaving like she could have.

She slides her arms around his neck and says “Where else would I be?”

Where else would she be but at the DNC, introducing her husband.

Nowhere, and definitely not with Ben. Ed shuffles her back towards the massive bed in the presidential suite and tips her onto the mattress.

There’s nowhere else to be.

*****

She misses him.

So, so much.

Ed’s in Wisconsin and Leslie’s back in DC with Sophie and her first instinct when she returns is to text Ben. She misses sliding into his arms after a long day, talking about speeches she’s given but mostly about what matters to her. She misses telling him stories about Sophie and thinking about where they would be now if she’d just been a little more patient and he hadn’t been so wounded.

They were kids. They were dumb, but she’d loved him. The longer he’d stayed away and the more men she met the more she loved him.

Up until Ed, and even then it was more about pushing feelings down than letting go of them completely.

If teenage Leslie and Ben hadn’t screwed up so badly they’d be together now, maybe living in Indiana or maybe DC, but very together. Sophie might have siblings - Leslie hoped she would have - and Ben would be stressing out about her going to parties and kissing boys and being fifteen. Leslie wouldn’t be lying in bed alone in the White House, that was for sure. They wouldn’t be at the White House yet.

Her phone buzzes and she practically jumps to check it. It’s not Ben (why would it be), it’s Sophie. She’d been quiet all day and kept exchanging looks with Andy whenever Leslie tried to make conversation.

_Can I sleep in your bed?_

_Sure, bring chocolate._

Sophie comes in wearing an oversized REM t-shirt that Leslie has never seen before. She raises an eyebrow.

“Since when do you like REM?”

“Since I started listening to Automatic for the People.”

Leslie stares at her, accepting the bag she’s handed as Sophie curls into the pillows.

“How come?”

“It’s what you listened to with my dad, right?”

Leslie’s throat closes up and her heart starts to race. Ed’s _Dad_. There’s the nameless “father” who got Leslie pregnant, but Ed is “Dad”. Ed is the guy who took her to dance class and cuddled her when there were monsters and is going to walk her down the aisle.

“What you listened to with Ben, I should say.”

Instantly, Sophie’s blue eyes flood with moisture. Leslie’s whole body seizes up and she’s frozen where she lies. Sophie knows. How the hell does she know and what happens now? Does Leslie hug her daughter? Apologize? Yell at her for going behind Leslie’s back and asking questions Leslie wasn’t ready to answer?

“I saw him.”

_Oh boy._

“Where?” Leslie chokes out. It says a lot about Leslie’s state of mind she’s more concerned with trying to picture the circumstances of their meeting than ask how Sophie even got there without her knowing.

“His apartment. Andy took me.”

She should definitely yell at Andy.

“When?”

“Last week.”

She should yell at Sophie too, but she really just wants to know how Ben is. She wants to know if his bedspread is plaid like he said it had been in high school. She wants to know if his couch is comfortable and if he has a balcony and bar stools and drapes.

“You were so sad when he left and he left for no reason, so I started...you guys weren’t exactly subtle.”

She’s too smart for her own good.

“Soph…”

“It’s okay, Mom. I made him tell me. And I deserved to know.”

She absolutely did deserve to know. Whether it was Ben’s place to tell Sophie was a different story.

“He’s...not in good shape.” Sophie saves Leslie from having to ask. “He’s fine, but he’s not. It’s like he’s just there. And I was sort of mean to him and he probably deserved it,  but then I started thinking of what it would be like if I got pregnant now or in two years and how scary that would be. And then I started reading up on him and found Ice Town and...it’s not an excuse, but I sort of get it.”

Leslie’s not saying anything. She’s trying not to cry by shoving candy into her mouth.

“And I called Grandma and she told me the rest.”

Leslie strokes Sophie's hair with trembling fingers. “You don’t have to forgive him. Or me, really.”

“But I do.” Sophie says. “He made bad choices and you moved on.”

Leslie nods, tears falling now. She wants to tell her daughter the bad choice was never Sophie. Sophie’s the best thing in her life and has been for fifteen years.

“Does Dad know it’s Ben?”

Leslie shook her head.

“Do you still love him?”

Leslie hiccups and Sophie sighs and rubs her arm.

“Mom.”

“Yes.” Leslie clears her throat. “I love him very much.”

“And you...he loves you, obviously.”

Leslie smiles a little.

“What about Dad?”

“I told Ben I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize Dad’s presidency and I meant it. That’s why Ben left.”

Sophie sits up, frowning.

“But if Dad wasn’t the president?”

“But he is.”

“But if he wasn’t.” Sophie presses, pointed and just a little aggressive. Just like Ed. “What would you do?”  

“I would do whatever you needed me to do. I always will.”

“I need you to be with the guy you love, not the guy you think makes it better for me. And you were a lot happier right up until Ben left. You haven’t been like that in a long time.”

Leslie’s smile is watery. “You shouldn’t talk to Grandma so much.”

Sophie giggles and snuggles down, swatting Leslie’s hands away from the bag of M&Ms. “Chocolate hog.”

“I’m just trying to catch up.”

Again Sophie giggles, though her eyes grow wet after a few seconds.

“It’s going to be hard.”

“What is?”

“You guys splitting up.”

Leslie sighs and kisses her daughter’s forehead. That’s not something to worry about now.

*****

When Ed wins again he kisses her. There are reporters and photographs are taken and for a moment, she’s happy like this. She’s happy to stay married to Ed and keep their family intact. She loves him for all the right reasons and thinks now that the election is done they’ll take some time for each other and be back to normal. She thinks they can stay married and, in time, she will tell Ed about Ben.  

Leslie blames their schedules, not the fact that Ed’s not the man she really wants to be with. She makes plans she wants to believe could happen. She really doesn’t want to have to end her marriage.

They try and Sophie watches. She never probes Leslie, but Leslie knows what she’s thinking. She knows she’s wondering why her mother is in deep denial about where she really wants to be. Their marriage is slipping away, down a rope Leslie is clinging to with everything she's got. She tells herself the affair with Ben was a disruption, not the spark that set her entire life ablaze.

Leslie and Ed take a quick vacation before Christmas, just the two of them. Ed ignores the outside world as much as the leader of the country can. They cook dinner together and talk and sip wine and make out a lot and it’s great. It’s wonderful, really. Nothing feels wrong.

But it’s not right either, not anymore.

What she said to Ann months ago is true. Ben or no Ben, her marriage is over.

On their last night away together Leslie tells Ed. Well, she starts to. He already knows what she’s going to say.

They decide not to announce it until after the state dinner. They tell Sophie the day after his inauguration.

Sophie cries and hugs them both. Leslie moves into a different bedroom for the time being. She wants to call Ben right away, but she doesn’t want Ed to get wind of that. As much as she wants to be with Ben, she’s not leaving her husband of a decade and then rushing to another man.

They announce it in the Rose Garden and take no questions. And that picture, the one of them kissing in a hotel room when he won his second term, will be shown on every news outlet for two weeks.

They will blame Leslie, not the president. It will annoy Leslie and make Sophie furious, but there will be nothing to be done about it. In the end it doesn’t matter what the press says, she’ll tell her daughter. What happened is between them.

*****

It’s Sophie who tells her Ben’s going to Afghanistan. Sophie heard it from Andy who heard it from Chris, who talked to Ben a few days before. Leslie calls Chris, who coordinates with her detail, who secures the airport terminal, which takes way too much time.

They also ground his flight indefinitely. It’s a slight abuse of power.   

When she sees him, his jaw sharper and his hair too short, all Leslie wants to do is jump into his arms. All she can do is yell at him for trying to leave and keep her hands to herself while he stares at her very hard. He stares at her in a way that makes her wonder exactly what he’s thinking, but leaves no doubt what’s going to happen when they’re alone.

When they are finally alone, in his apartment with nothing but time, he fucks her until she sees stars. Until the sun comes up and her foot’s cramping from all the toe curling, and the sheets are a crinkled, sweaty mess. It’s a miracle they don’t break the bed, honestly.

*****

They go camping in Indiana, mostly to get away from the news cycle and give Sophie a break from it all. Ed’s on a foreign trip and Leslie needs her own distraction that isn’t just Ben’s lips. They go on hikes and catch fish and gradually, Sophie warms up to Ben again. He dissects every REM album for her, listens as she tells him her plans for the future, and grins when she shows him an idea binder she brought.

“Just like your mom.”

Sophie shrugs and sways into Ben just a little.

Later that night she makes him a s’more.

*****

The strangest part of her separation is coming back to DC, but Sophie can’t be out of school forever. They find a house in a nice neighborhood where many other government officials reside. Ed’s second term really takes off. He’s working hard with Congress and making good on a lot of his campaign promises. One news outlet says Leslie was obviously holding him back.

She cries that night and Sophie promises her that’s not true.

Ben doesn’t move in with them, not officially anyway. He keeps his apartment and sneaks over as often as he can. They’ll have to come clean eventually, but Leslie doesn’t want to distract from the president. Ben brings groceries and makes them dinner and, to Leslie’s horror, Sophie seems to enjoy calzones. He helps Sophie with homework and when Sophie goes to bed they drink wine and cuddle on the couch.

“Are you going to run for office?” He asks Leslie one night, when he’s playing with her hair. She sighs.

“If I do it’ll be when Sophie’s in college.”

“And until then?”

“Maybe I’ll publish the first volume of my memoirs. Editors have been calling.”

“To ask you to write about your divorce.”

“I’m not divorced yet.”

Ben sips his drink and drags his thumb along her arm. She kisses his neck and he hums.

“Four months.”

“Trust me, I’ve got a calendar.”

Leslie squirms up to meet his lips. “What are you going to do when I’m divorced?”

“Marry you.”

“Mhmmm.”

“Have more kids with you.”

Her throat tightens and her eyes start to sting. Ben kisses her temple.

“All the things I should’ve done fifteen years ago.” He pauses. “Also, I know we’re going to have to wait to announce it and timing and all that, but I’m getting really sick of having to sneak over here, hide my car and leave before sunrise.”

“Me too.”

He drains his glass and sits up slowly.

“Let’s go to bed.”

She doesn’t need to be told twice.

*****

Five months after their separation, Sophie comes home from a weekend with Ed with the most massive eyes Leslie’s ever seen.

“Soph, what’s - ?”

“ _Dad has a girlfriend_.”

Leslie drops the whisk she was holding and Ann yelps as brownie batter splatters everywhere.

“He _what_?”

“He has a girlfriend. Her name is Colleen Lewis and she’s in Congress. She’s the representative from Vermont.”

“Oh my god.” Ann’s jaw drops. “Are you kidding me?”

“He’s giving an interview on it tomorrow. Every outlet’s broadcasting it. It’s a special event: The President’s New Love.”

Sophie motions like she’s gagging, but Leslie’s shaking. With adrenaline or anxiety or something, but she’s shaking. She doesn’t hear the footsteps enter the kitchen, nor Ben greet Sophie and Ann as he sets down some bags.

“What’s wrong?”

“Dad’s got a girlfriend.”

Ben blinks. “Wow.”

“I know!”

“What’s she like?”

“Not like Mom.” Sophie walks to the fridge and gets a soda. “It was so weird, I had to have dinner with them and...yeah, I’ve never seen him like that. He was very...it was so weird. She slept in his room too.”

Ann slides an arm around Sophie. She doesn’t look upset, just sort of in shock.

“She’s freaking out.” Ann says to Ben, pointing at Leslie. He nods and pulls her towards him. He smells like aftershave and sweat and she presses closer. It calms her, but only a little.  

“Hoooooney.” He rubs her back. “Talk to me, are you okay?”

“ _We’ve_ been hiding and we’ll have to keep hiding and he gets to _have a girlfriend_?”

“It’s not fair.” Ann agrees. “But that stupid article in the Post…”

“He has a girlfriend, Ben!”

“I know, babe, it’s okay.”

“Ben can’t even sleep over and she’s having _sleepovers_ at the freaking White House!”

“It’s okay, Leslie. We knew it was going to be a different standard for him.” Ben strokes her hair. “But it’s fine.”

He winds an arm around her and Leslie experiences the sudden urge to pepper his face with kisses. She does and Sophie calls _gross._ Leslie ignores her and hugs Ben’s neck. He’s grinning now.

“Uh, what was that for?”

“Move in.”

There’s silence for several seconds. 

“Really? You can’t file for divorce for another - ”

“I don’t care. My ex-husband’s having sexy sleepovers at the White House with his new girlfriend. Move in with us.”

She kisses him again and Sophie groans and says they’re going to go watch TV. Leslie waves them away and pushes up on her tiptoes. Ben lifts her into him, letting her taste the coffee on his tongue.

The next night, with Ed’s interview on in the background, they unpack what’s left of Ben’s stuff. Leslie makes room in the closet and Sophie folds shirts while Ben moves boxes.

“This is okay, right?” Leslie asks, when Ben’s making another trip to the car. Sophie nods.

“He lives here anyway, we’re just making it official.”

Leslie could not agree more.

*****

“So, Mrs. Carmichael - ”

“Ms. Knope,” Leslie corrects quietly. The interviewer smiles at her, though it’s definitely pained. Leslie folds her hands and crosses her legs. First Lady Leslie Carmichael is more reserved than Leslie Knope would be in this situation. Leslie Knope would be shouting from the rooftops how in love she is and how great Ben’s butt is, and how everything feels right for the first time in a very long time.

She really wants to be Leslie Knope again, it just won’t happen overnight.

“How has it been since the separation? You kind of just...disappeared?” She lets out a canned laugh that Leslie matches. Sophie’s behind the camera, with Ben. They’re both rolling their eyes a little.

“I wanted to keep things as private as possible for Sophie. That is a luxury the president does not have.”

“But now you’ve got a beautiful new house and your memoirs are coming out and you’ve even met Ms. Lewis.”

Leslie flashes back to the night Ed invited Leslie to dinner. He wanted to keep everything above board and thought it was only right she meet the woman he was seeing if she was going to be around Sophie.

If Ben had been anyone but Ben she might have brought him too, but she feared the can of worms that might open. Such as questions about when their relationship started and how Ben ended up on the president’s detail...

A lesser man would’ve been upset he was excluded. Ben just gave them both a kiss - Sophie on the forehead and Leslie on the lips - and told them they looked nice before they got into the limo.

Ed knew about Ben. She told him when he called her after signing the divorce papers. He said nothing and Leslie decided it was better that way.

“And what are your plans after that?” The interviewer continues. “Political ambitions?”

Leslie beams. “I’ve always been interested in running for office; it was something Ed and I talked about happening later.”

“What’s it like?” The interviewer leans forward like it’s time for girl talk with 100 million people watching. “Seeing your husband with another woman?”

“Well, he’s not my husband anymore.”

“Still, it must be hard.”

“Not really.” Leslie glances at Ben. “I want him to be happy.”

Ed deserves to be happy. 

“And are you happy?”

Leslie nods, knowing no words on national TV could ever explain how these have been the best seven months of her life. How Ben and Sophie and the new addition she hasn’t told anyone about yet are all she needs.

“Yes.” She meets Ben’s eyes and watches his lips curl into a smirk. Jerk. “I really, really am.”


End file.
